Graduation Frustrations

3:18 PM Marcellino DAmbrosio 7 Comments

So I’m sure many of you are very…. interested in hearing about my first experience working a nine to five job. Instead of telling this story several times over, I thought I’d just write it up on the ol’ blog.

            When I got home, I immediately (and by immediately, I mean after a week of straight Starcraft 2 ownage), I wrote up a kick ass resume for event planning. Then after running it by most trusted advisors, I threw that one away and made a new one.

Resume #1.

I sent it out to about 20 different event planning company’s and got three offers. Concerning those of you who are in collage or have not yet entered the work force, there are two words that you need to fear more than any other. Those words are “Internship” and “Entry Level.” If the former is slave labor, then the latter is “share cropping.” In other words, if you are in collage now or just graduating, you = this guy:




You are looking at either working for free, or if you are lucky, for $11 per hour. “But it’s good work experience,” you say “you have to be trained in your field!” I’ll refrain from pointing out the obvious pun.



Pictured Above: Valuable work experience.

So you are probably wondering if I was pouring coffee for free or for $14 an hour. The answer is neither. I lifting boxes in a warehouse which lacked air conditioning for somewhere in between “free” and “peanuts.” When all was said and done, had I worked for more than a week, I would have been making about enough to pay for the gas bill it took to make the hour and fifteen minute commute into Fort Worth. If you are bad at math, I’ll help you out. $0 = not enough to move out of my house.


The College Graduate’s future bedroom.

“Well even if you are driving two and a half hours a day to do manual labor in a warehouse without air conditioning and living at your parents house, it’s just a stepping stone, right? The career of your dreams is probably waiting for you somewhere on the other side of the rainbow!”  OR IS IT MY OPTIMISTIC FRIEND? HOW MUCH DO YOU LIKE YOUR BOSS!

Yeah...

Ehm. Sorry. I got a little carried away there. But seriously, how many of you really wanted to have a boss when you were five years old? My ideal career is one in which I am the boss. Would you agree? But there is always a “but,” here it comes….
 “But Marcellino, it’s time to grow up and face reality, everyone has to work for a boss.”
Mr. Strawman sir, I have a question for you. Where did your job come from? What I mean is, someone somewhere actually owns the business you work at. Someone somewhere signed the lease on your office building, hired your boss’s boss, and right now is probably sailing his yacht to the Bahamas.

With a Tennis Court

So no, not everyone has a boss. But anyway, back to my story. I worked at Bella Events for a boss named Bambi and her husband who everyone called “Hefe.” I was employed for one week total. After working in the warehouse alongside several 200 lb, six foot tall blue collar type guys, I was moved into the office to train under Tiff, a cute sorority girl with about as much personality as a rock. She had absolutely no interest in training me, as that would take some effort, so I sat in the office watching her do work for two days strait.



Commence Twiddling!

Third day roles around and Tiff is nowhere to be found. She up and quit, leaving me totally untrained. Hefe, the boss man, brings me into his office as soon has he gets in, sits me down, and drops the following pile of bullshit: “From what I’ve heard, Marcellino, it’s not looking so good for you. Everyone says that you just aren’t doing anything, that you are too laid back, just lounging around. If a racehorse is gonna run, he’s gonna run.”

Indeed.

I told him what I thought about that statement in the most tactful voice possible. Of course I didn’t look like I was working! You told me to sit down and watch Tiff do her thing. Either way, Tiff was gone. This meant that I was now actually being trained by Maggi, the woman in charge of rentals. I really started to learn, and by the end of the day, I thought I had a pretty good handle on it all. That was on Wednesday. On Thursday, I came in and worked my ass off. I was slow, but I was getting it. I was asking five million questions every five minutes, taking notes, and now I didn’t really even need Maggi. I was on a role. Friday came around, and I finished all of the work that needed to be done and hour and a half early. Keep in mind, my friends, that Hefe and Bambi were both around all week long. Here comes the kicker. Turns out, Bambi had sent me an email on Wednesday afternoon letting me know that I was fired. I forgot to check my email until Saturday. I worked two days after I was already fired, and NO ONE SAID A DAMNED THING.


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7 comments:

  1. Haha,,, that's freaking hilarious that your were working for two days after being fired... haha. guess I can't laugh too hard since I'm also unemployed. lol. Good read though!

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  2. A. I am currently making $12 an hour at 2 different jobs and picking up a hefty $15 an hour at another temp thing that's lasting about a week longer.

    B. This seemed like a lot to me (though I know it is nowhere near enough to be financially independent, and I am still living at home with the fam, and commuting at least 2.5 hrs a day) because I have been working for the AveMachine for four years getting paid an amount that is below minimum wage in the state of Washington.

    C. For those of you who do not have the amazing entrepreneurial spirit of the D'Ambrosio brothers, there is another option! The only reason I am putting up with these shitty circumstances for a few (+) months is because I am going back to school. And THIS time, I am making the school pay for me (...wait... didn't I do that last time as well? but I digress). That's right, if you are the academic-type, and are willing to put in the time and drudgery studying for that heinous invention of Satan called the GRE and applying to a load of schools and working for diddly squat (in my case staring at a 3 mo old for 4.5 hrs a day and then filing papers for another few hours), then you can eventually (I hope!) get PAID to read books, write papers about them, and attend class, my three favorite things to do. Nerd, you say? Proudly.

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  3. Marcellino, I enjoyed reading your blog nice imagery. It reminds me of an article from Cracked.
    That being said …
    You are a beady-eyed Marxist.
    There are thinkers and there are doers. The United States has the only Job Market in the world that has consistently rewarded both.
    Think big, bust your ass and there is an 80% chance your labor will bear fruit (20% of the time fate beats your ass down).
    Two random notes:
    1.) your Website...
    "To turn things around in the battle against poverty, hunger, and human trafficking, there needed to be a 360 degree turn around in the way business was done here in the US." Do we want to turn 360 or 180 …I think that 360 might lead us down the same road…
    2.)From your blog…
    Yachts do not equal independence they equal taxes and docking fees.

    The CEOs of the fortune 500 Companies busted their asses harder than any underpaid kids moving boxes in a warehouse.
    It really confuses me when a middle class American college grads works a 9-5 for a few days and then curses American business because they feel low and insignificant.
    All those “bosses with no bosses” worked their entire lives and now work every single day. They are slaves just their chains are made of Gold. Sure their children may not need to work but they sure as hell do.
    I expected you to be advocating owning property and developing a more self-sufficient community to put distance between your family and the all-intrusive federal government (owning a floating tennis court is not everyones american dream).
    Personally, I would take hundreds of fertile acres out west over a Yacht any day.

    THE RANT:
    You are an ant-establishment Marxist who dreams of profit without toil, pleasure without pain, and reward without merit. The only reason you have time for these dreams, or the means to share them, is because of the Capitalist cooperate machine that has built up everything that you apparently both hate and desire

    I will call you in 5 years,
    Think big, do great things the rest is all about running with God’s plans.

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  4. #1 Rule of the "Four Hour Work Week" (an entrepreneurial book written by a capitalist): "Don't spend time on stupid people."

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  5. I just read this post, and I have to agree with what you have to say about it all. However, I don't think that it is right to "fire" an employee via e-mail. It just does not sound quite right!

    On the selfish coworkers! I have been there, and I hated it. I was taken advantage of, because I was the youngest on staff! There were days I was in tears with the bull shit thrown at me by the new hire. Let alone, I trained this woman who turned into a power trip.

    Good Luck with the new project!

    -Sherene

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  6. Ok well there is a lot that can be said here... but Im gonna keep it simple first and say that you better have a newsletter or something for this new business of y'alls cause your writing is off the chain! Also! I think everyone can agree when i say you arent exactly a cubicle type personality, so keep shaking things up, keep things interesting and see what all the new challenges you can bring to your life from day to day. Y'all are gonna rock it out with this Welling Up of yours lol so keep up the hard work! You just gotta focus it on what your real goal is, not pushing boxes or watching Clueless type on a computer!!
    I've spoken my peace and now its up to yall to spread your own! lol Good luck and God Bless in all y'alls upcoming adventures!!

    -Leahlyn

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  7. *straight
    *either
    *college

    @Blackshp33: He didn't say he didn't want to work, he said he was going to become an entrepreneur. That's not marxism, that's the OPPOSITE - in fact, the United States was based on entrepreneurship. If anything, I congratulate this guy for gaining his independence and working for his financial security in a way that he feels will be more successful than labouring away at something that doesn't actually benefit him economically.

    Good luck with your entrepreneurship
    BTW, didn't you major in Literature? How do you get away with spelling 'college' wrong?? LOL :)

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